First Second Date

I agreed to meet “Doctor Marty” at La Scala last night. The time and location indicated that it would definitely be a dinner date. As a general rule I try not to do food dates until farther down the line but due to the small windows of time I have to meet Doc, I couldn’t really get around it. Food dates are rough. When do you talk? In between chews? Also, it’s hard to leave food dates if you want to jet. You have to wait till you’re both done eating and the waiter asks about dessert. Meeting for drinks is more conducive to leaving quickly if need be. Plus I don’t like to have anyone spend money on me. Makes me feel like I owe them something. So blah, blah, blah we met for dinner.
As soon as I parked I received a text from him saying La Scala was closed so we should walk down the street. I exited the elevator from the parking structure and he was waiting across the street in front of the closed restaurant.
If we do fall in love and he does read this someday I am going to feel like an ass. Or maybe I will be thankful for it, and it will help him/us. Here’s the thing…
He needs a style overhaul. The guy has such untapped potential that some new threads could unearth. When I came home last night I tried to explain the color and style of the shirt he had on to my sister. I was at a loss for words. It was short sleeve, button up, and sort of chartreuse/sort of olive. I think he was wearing jeans but the shirt was so distracting I’m not sure. It either had a built-in t-shirt underneath or I could see the t-shirt that was a similar green but not exact. I AM SUCH A BITCH. God I hate myself right now. Look, I’m not some style maven myself, but I know how to throw an outfit together and appreciate when my man does too. It didn’t help that I saw Afkah when I got home. He brings me food from his meal delivery company a few nights a week, (very nice of him for sure,) so I saw him looking perfect as usual. Geez, it’s hard not to compare people to “Afkah.” I love his style. His clothes always fit him perfectly and looked like he could walk the runway every time he left the house. I would often say to him, “Hey! Why are you so dressed up? Now I have to get dressed up.” He would say, “I’m wearing jeans and a T-shirt.” He just looked so good all the time it seemed fancy. It’s not fair to compare other men physically to Afkah. Afkah was literally my dream man before we started dating. Since the moment I laid eyes on him I thought he was physical perfection. I could watch a movie like “300,” and say, “Wow, my man’s body is just as hot as Gerry Butler.” Twelve pack, super muscular arms and shoulders, but not gross or threatening like a body builder. And he’s incredibly handsome in my opinion. But right now I need to get my head out of my ass and remember THAT DOES NOT MATTER. He wasn’t attracted to me after some years so I stopped being able to reap the benefits of having a hot husband anyway. Even when Afkah and I were together I would joke with my friends saying, ” My next husband will not be as hot as me. I will be the hot one and he will worship the ground I walk on.” And I really do want that. I want someone to think I’m beautiful and appreciate the way I work hard to take care of myself. I want someone to be proud to walk down the street with me. I don’t think Afkah was.
Back to the date.
We walked down the street to another place. I don’t even know what it was called but it was very busy. They surprisingly had an open table and sat us right away. The table was so close to the table next to us it was literally like we were all at the same table. I said hello to the ladies at “our” table and we commented about how we were almost touching elbows. Would you like to know their life stories? Because I know Ann and Joan’s life stories. They grew up in Brentwood and now live in Westwood. They’ve owned a candy shop in Brentwood for 40 years. The chattier one is best friends with Sally Struthers and learned how to distract paparazzi from her years of shielding Sally when she would come to visit the shop. They are very close with Arnold and Maria as well. Oh, and they’ve known the Olson twins since they were itty bitties. They dog sat Marilyn Monroe’s dog when she lived next door to their childhood home. If you visit their store try the turtles. They have them with pecans, cashews, or walnuts!! Also the chocolate dipped honeycomb is to die for. I’m sure you’re wondering what Dr. Marty and I talked about ourselves? Not much, unfortunately. We mostly talked to the candy gals and when it was just the two of us talking it was surface and a bit boring, I must confess. I can’t blame this on Doc. It’s hard to converse when the people on either side of you are silent and can hear every word of your convo. The woman on the other side of me chimed in and said, “Oh, you’re a doctor? He’s an orthopedic surgeon,” as she pointed to her husband. I also felt weird talking about my kid. Usually she’s all I want to talk about but I felt a little embarrassed when the candy gals asked me how old she was and I said one year. I’m sure they were wondering what the hell I was doing on a date when I have a baby at home. “Did she get knocked up by a stranger now she’s trying to get this guy to fit the bill?” You get what I mean. He did make me laugh once. He told me he went with a girlfriend to get her belly button pierced and described the process as “barbaric.” That made me laugh aloud. To sum up the date, however, I have to say I was pretty bored. He’s already asked me out again and I’ll go but if it was as dull as last night, I’m moving on. I should remind myself that my first few dates with Afkah were boring as hell. I was just so attracted to him I kept going out with him till one night we finally clicked and had a blast.
I guess that’s all I have to say about that.
If it’s you’re first time reading, Afkah stands for Artist Formerly Known As Husband. The picture is of The Candy Alley. Joan and Ann’s spot!
Thank you for reading. 🙂


2 thoughts on “First Second Date

  1. Think of the mind as the most attractive muscle . He must have a good one if he is a doctor. Also, clothes do not make the man! And remember Afka was not the greatest conversationalist!


  2. I totally know Joan and Ann! LOL. I used to go to Candy Alley a lot growing up. Too funny! Hope the next date is better. xo


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